Final+Paper

__ RCG: Girls and Self Esteem __ __ Leah Gilbert-Odem and Helen Samuel __ __ December 13, 2010 __

What is self-esteem? Well, self esteem is how much one values themselves, or, in other words, how highly one thinks about how they look, how they dress, how they talk, their social standings, etc. People with high self-esteem tend to be more comfortable and confident with themselves. They often are more independent, more willing to take risks, and much happier overall. High self-esteem can be achieved from many things: getting good grades, having great friends, even something as simple as getting a new item of clothing that you happen to adore. People with low self-esteem are the opposite: they are self-conscious and judgmental of themselves. Someone with low-self esteem might have characteristics such as social withdrawal, self-neglect, and eating disorders, which can be very dangerous. Usually, people with lower self-esteem are unhappy with some aspect of themselves, like their body image, their grades, their social ranking, or a variety of other issues. We learned a lot through researching this topic, including who self esteem affects the most and why, what types of things affect ones self esteem, and how self esteem affects people in general. Throughout out this paper we will be focusing mainly on these three points and hopefully, by the end, we will have cleared up many of the mysteries involving self-esteem, creating a better understanding of the issue and why it’s so important.

Girls and Puberty: the 2 key words when talking about low self-esteem. Although anyone can have low self-esteem, it is most prominent in girls going through puberty because they experience so many changes in such a short period of time. Going through the amount of internal and external changes that pubescent girls do is extremely hard: it can lead to self-consciousness, insecurities, and confusion about identity. These are all major contributors to low self-esteem. Along with the physical changes come many emotional transformations: girls begin to see everything differently, including themselves. As a girl enters adolescence and leaves girl behind and steps a toe in womanhood, there is a lot of unknown territory being discovered. Each individual person sees this territory differently and interprets it differently. For some adolescence can be a brisk walk across a bridge, but for a majority of girls, it’s a difficult steady walk with hands on the fence at all times. What is significant about this time that causes such a large drop in self-esteem? There is one basic word: change. Whenever stepping into a new path or new journey, you are always searching. You seek another to follow. Just one other to get the basic idea: what to do, what to say, and plainly how to be. The fault comes her, when our main source of role models comes from the media.

Self-esteem can be influenced by all kinds of things: appearance, peers, expectations, even ones parents can have an affect on the way some feels about herself. Appearance, body image, attractiveness, whatever you want to call it, the way one looks, or, in many girls cases, the way one imagines she looks, probably has the biggest affect on ones self-esteem. Everyday American girls are exposed to hundreds of media images portraying the “perfect woman:” tiny waist, long hair, big boobs, flawless features and dazzling skin. With expectations set so high and images such as these flashed in front of girls every time they flip through a magazine or turn on the TV, it’s near impossible for one not to compare herself to the media’s definition of beauty. And when a girl begins comparing herself to the fake images society calls beautiful, she begins to find faults in herself, which cause insecurities that ultimately lead to low self-esteem. Another major influence on girls self esteem is what they hear from peers, friends, and family. Other’s opinions, thoughts, and feelings matter greatly to almost every teenage girl, so when something negative comes out of another’s mouth about how they look, girls will always relate the comment back to themselves and their own appearance. Another example would be if your best friend said, “I’m so stupid, I got an 89% on that test,” But you got an 80%. That comment would make anyone feel stupid or incapable: if your friend did better then you yet they are still stupid, then what would that make you? The problem with things that others say is that they can always lower ones self-esteem, but only that person can raise it again.

The way you perceive yourself makes all the difference in how you view the outside world. One that respects him/her self is much more likely to share that respect with others, while the contrast would be a bully suffering from low self esteem let’s escape the harsh words the she repeats to herself every single day. This is one out come of low or unhealthy self-esteem: inflicting pain on others because in some delusional world, it will make you feel better. Sometimes though, the affect of low self-esteem is quite the opposite; a person might inflict pain on himself or herself. Although this is most common among girls: Anorexia. Eating disorders are a major and fatal outcome of a low-self esteem. A girl unhappy about herself in someway assumes, if she can look good for everyone else, then that will make her feel better. She will then only get obsessed with changing herself. “A person who trims himself or herself to suit everybody will soon whittle himself away.” This quote might have been said to reference changing your personality, but it works all the same. Thin, skeleton, and underweight isn’t a figure that anyone should desire, and you can trust that, that is not what ‘everybody’ finds attractive either. One with low self-esteem might also suffer from self-neglect. In my opinion, this would result from that desire or hunger to please others. Sometimes you need to do things simply for yourself; there are too much concern swirling around about what other people think. The inability to except comments is another outcome of unhealthy self-esteem. Although, a person with high self-esteem takes pride in themselves and their accomplishments and doesn’t need a person over their shoulders reminding them that they are beautiful, that they are worth it. That tape recorder is already playing in the minds of those with healthy self-esteem. A person with high self-esteem could quite conceivable be an optimist, or those are the only ones you’re going to fine, anyway.

Self-esteem has some powerful affects, as well as other variables contributing to it. Adolescent girls are the group you would find that sudden drop of self-esteem. They’re peers, they’re parents and mainly the media are all contributors to this descending. Peers express sexual innuendoes, parent’s might have unrealistic expectations for you, and the media tells you that you are not perfect. The general goal is to get a majority of people on a path to a high or healthy self-esteem so they can be a person that holds respect for others, one who takes responsibility, takes risks, self-motivates, and takes control of their life. But how can we get to that point, how do we begin to boost a person’s self-esteem. The answer maybe surprising; you cannot. You may be able to temporarily but telling someone their pretty will not alter they’re mindset. It is common that competence gives you confidence, and that confidence will build your self-esteem piece by piece. So you must let a person realize they’re competence on they’re own. This method works because first of all, it allows a person to earn their confidence. Feeding compliments will only make a person feel that much more unstable. Practicing and using self-gained confidence will make a person make one feel competent and even self-worthy.

 · Eating disorders, low self-esteem, and depression are the most common mental health problems in girls.

 · 59% of 5–12th grade girls in one survey were dissatisfied with their body shape.

 · 20–40% of girls begin dieting at age 10.

 · By 15, girls are twice as likely to become depressed than boys.

 · Among 5–12th graders, 47% said they wanted to lose weight because of magazine pictures.

 · Health risks accompany girls' drop in self-esteem due to risky eating habits, depression, and unwanted pregnancy.

 · Girls aged 10 and 12 (tweens) are confronted with "teen" issues such as dating and sex, at increasingly earlier ages. 73% of 8–12–year olds dress like teens and talk like teens.

 · 78% of girls with low self-esteem admit that it is hard to feel good in school when you do not feel good about how you look (compared to 54% of girls with high self-esteem).

 · 70% of girls ages 15 to 17 avoid normal daily activities such as attending school, going to the doctor, or even giving their opinion "due to feeling badly about one’s looks."

 · 75% of teenage girls felt 'depressed, guilty and shameful' after spending just three minutes leafing through a fashion magazine.  · Only 2% of women describe themselves as “beautiful”

 · While only 19% of teenage girls are "overweight," 67% think they "need to lose weight"

 · 90% of eating disorders are found in girls